Friday, February 1, 2008

Psst. Right now I'm procrastinating, hiding and looking busy

My husband thinks I sit in my office and fart around on the Internet all day. Yes, I say, I do this for a living. They pay me good money (well, not so much) to do so. But today I really AM farting around and not working very much because I am tired, sort of depressed and feeling really quite desperate, and I just don't want to write or edit anything important. So I shan't. I shall fart around all I please until it's time to go home. Then I shall watch mindless television, drink a bit or two of wine, snack on something fattening and welcome Miss Barky McSchnauzer for the next two weeks.

Miss Barky is the purse puppy belonging to a pair of my husband's better customers, Mr. and Mrs. Thurston Howell (not their real names), and so he volunteered us (i.e., ME) to care for her during their two-week jaunt to St. John (like that alliteration, you language geeks?). Miss Barky (not her real name, either) comes with her four little boots so her tiny little paws don't get raw with road salt when we walk her each day. Which -- and the Howells probably wouldn't believe this -- we don't do. I can't stand walking dogs. Hey, I tried it when we had one of our own. I just don't like doing it. You can't really get going at any decent pace when you walk a dog. It's not like the treadmill, unless yours is all herky-jerky and downright stops and sniffs sometimes. But we act like we'll dutifully walk Miss B morning, noon and night just so they won't worry that they're dropping off their little dog into the clutches of hell.

I still like Barky anyhow, even though Maisie, the cat who lets us live with her, will probably retreat into the rafters down the basement for the next two weeks. Barky really does bark, and Maisie just hates all that damned noise. Besides, she has to eat her food on top of the dryer, for godssakes, when Barky is around or there won't be any. It's enough to drive a kitteh krazy.

No, I am not drinking anything at the moment. I am in my office where no one is watching me. They should know better than to leave me alone with the Internet.

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